Funny and Useful Texts and Poems

HAVE YOU EVER BEEN GUILTY OF LOOKING AT OTHERS YOUR OWN AGE AND THINKING, ?SURELY I CAN'T LOOK THAT OLD??



WELL, YOU?LL LOVE THIS ONE.



MY NAME IS ALICE SMITH AND I WAS SITTING IN THE WAITING ROOM FOR MY FIRST APPOINTMENT WITH A NEW DENTIST WHEN I NOTICED HIS DDS DIPLOMA, WHICH BORE HIS FULL NAME.



SUDDENLY, I REMEMBERED THAT A TALL, HANDSOME, DARK-HAIRED BOY WITH THE SAME NAME HAD BEEN IN MY HIGH SCHOOL CLASS SOME 40-ODD YEARS AGO. COULD HE BE THE SAME GUY THAT I HAD A SECRET CRUSH ON, WAY BACK THEN?



UPON SEEING HIM, HOWEVER, I QUICKLY DISCARDED ANY SUCH THOUGHT.



THIS BALDING, GREY-HAIRED MAN WITH THE DEEPLY LINED FACE WAS WAY TOO OLD TO HAVE BEEN MY CLASSMATE.



AFTER HE EXAMINED MY TEETH, I ASKED HIM IF HE HAD ATTENDED MORGAN PARK HIGH SCHOOL.



?YES, YES, I DID. I?M A MUSTANG? HE BEAMED WITH PRIDE.



?WHEN DID YOU GRADUATE??, I ASKED.



HE ANSWERED , ?IN 1967. WHY DO YOU ASK??



?YOU WERE IN MY CLASS!?, I EXCLAIMED.



HE LOOKED AT ME CLOSELY. THEN, THAT UGLY, OLD, BALD, WRINKLED, FAT ASS, GREY-HAIRED, DECREPIT SON-OF-A-BITCH ASKED, ?WHAT DID YOU TEACH??

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